My Immortal
by ThaDoctor17
Summary: Alternate of "Sleep the Pain Away". NaruHina Angst songfic to "My Immortal" by Evanescence. Very sad. Hinata is dead, Naruto is Hokage. How does he handle his soulmate's death?


_Disclaimer: Masashi Kishimoto owns Naruto._

_Author's Note:  I wrote this from 3:30, to 4:30 AM.  I cried while I wrote it. I changed some of the words to the song to fit my meaning.  Actually, a lot of the words, and if you don't like it blow me.  I do._

**_Song: "My Immortal" by Evanescence_**

**"I'm so tire of being here, suppressed by all my childish fears, and if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave, cuz your presence still lingers here, and it won't leave me alone."**

                This was the worst day of Uzumaki Naruto's life.  He had been through a lot in his life; his parents died right after he was born; his best friend, Uchiha Sasuke, had turned against him and died in an attempt to kill him; his love interest, and at the time, best friend, Haruno Sakura had killed herself in the news of his Sasuke's death; and even every one of his mentors, from the Third, to the Fifth, to Jiraya and Kakashi had all been murdered by members of Akatsuki.  Still after 25 years of hardships, and losses, this was by far the most painful.  His lover, his wife, his best friend, and his soul mate was dead.  Killed by Uchiha Madara, the founder of the Uchiha Clan.  She was Hyuuga Hinata, age 25, as beautiful as ever, and full of compassion.  She had given her life to protect her village; Konoha was everything to her.  There was one thing she neglected to consider when she sacrificed herself to finally destroy the group known as Akatsuki, and their leader; she had left her precious village in the hands of a broken man.  The Sixth Hokage of Konoha was Uzumaki Naruto, and he was dead inside.

**"These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real, there's just too much that time cannot erase."**

                Naruto searched through the photo albums he had of himself and Hinata.  Tears dripped down the Hokage's face as he came to their first date.  Neji had taken the pictures as surveillance, trying to keep his cousin safe.  Hinata's face was so red in them all Naruto laughed at how oblivious he had been at the time. 

Trying to fight through his tears he turned the page, coming to several pictures of them at various events and parties, hand in hand.  It seemed as though he and Hinata could do anything while holding each other's hand.  He felt empowered when he held it the first time; she had practically fainted, and yet she still managed to smile.  It was amazing how much she could take with a smile.  On that page was also the only proof of their first kiss right outside Ichiraku's.  They had both been nervous and the kiss looked sloppy enough for Naruto to force a smile out of himself

He sobbed and turned the page again, seeing himself on one knee in front of the most beautiful girl in the world who had tears streaking down her face with a huge smile on her face.  He had proposed that night after having gotten everything arranged with her father.  She had cried and nodded her head violently trying to express her joy.  He had then started to cry as well, and their first kiss as fiancé's had been over dramatized with the framed picture on their dresser.  He looked at the copy in his album and sniffled, trying to gain composure.  He turned the page slowly, hoping to see something less painful to remember.

As soon as the page landed down flat against the previous one, Naruto began bawling and pushed the album off of his desk.  The page was nothing but wedding photos and a single picture of their newborn son; he had Hinata's eyes, and Naruto's hair.  Suddenly 10 years worth of memories flooded through Naruto, shattering his small glass case of sanity.

**"When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears, when you screamed I'd fight away all of your fears, I held your hand through all of these years, but you still have… all of me."**

Naruto fell to the floor sobbing and punching it.  A hole appeared in the tile, and down through two stories and several feet of dirt.  This was so unbecoming of a Hokage.  He tried to regain composure but couldn't help blaming himself.  His first year as Hokage, he assigned Uzumaki Hinata, an experienced Jounin to an S-Rank mission along with her old team of Inuzuka Kiba and Aburame Shino.  It had been a routine search and destroy, but the enemy was not who they had expected.  Uchiha Madara was Tobi, the true leader of Akatsuki, and Hinata died taking him with her.  Both of their bodies were recovered shattered at the bottom of the cliff, although it appeared as though Madara's heart had stopped on the way down.  She had destroying Konoha's strongest adversary at the cost of her own life.  Now Naruto had to deal with that.

**"You used to captivate me, by your resonating light, now I'm bound by the life you left behind.  Your face it holds, my once pleasant dreams, your voice it chased away all the sanity in me.  These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real, there's just too much time cannot erase."**

                Naruto knew he had to be strong for the sake of his village.  He was responsible for them now, but he couldn't think of them.  Why him?  He had lost his parents, his mentors, his friends, and lastly, his one true love.  Perhaps it was only because it was Hinata, or maybe she was just the straw that broke the camel's back, but Naruto snapped.  He stood up and walked outside, jumping to the top of the Hokage's faces.  He sat on the Third's, and screamed at the top of his lungs. 

He didn't want this responsibility now; he wanted someone else to take care of him.  He never had that until Hinata came along; he had always had to depend on himself.  But when he was with Hinata, he could show his true feelings.  He could cry for his parents, and his friends; he could cry for his problems, and he could cry just because he felt like crying.  No matter the reason, he was never judged, Hinata would hold him no matter what, and she would whisper in his ear that it was okay.  She always claimed he was so strong, but she was the strong one; she was the reason he was strong.  Without her he would still be a Genin and he would still be scraping at the bottom, and hated by the village.  He had done a lot on his own before he was with Hinata, but it all paled in comparison to the love he felt, and the strength he gained from her.  She was his rock; she was his legs, and without her he fell.

**"When I cried you'd wipe away all of my tears, when I screamed you'd fight away all of my fears, you held my hand through all of these years, you still have… all of me."**

                He fell forward, losing his balance, all the way off the faces and to the ground.  He let the ground rush towards him, not even putting his hands out to catch himself.  Maybe he would die if he landed headfirst and he wouldn't have to deal with these responsibilities.  Maybe he would meet her in heaven and they could be happy again.  He could hold her one last time, kiss her lips again, feel her warm breath on his neck.  Now he fantasized of staring into her eyes; oh how he would get lost in those eyes. 

He adjusted himself for the maximum impact; he would most definitely die if he landed like this.  His neck would snap like a twig against the ground and his own weight.  Less than a minute until his life would end, and thoughts rushed through his head.  His whole life flashed, and he sobbed once more.

**"I tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone, but though you're not with me, I'm not alone, not alone."**

                At the last second he realized the most important thing he ever could.  He had a son.  Not only did he have a son, but he had Hinata's son.  His son had her eyes, and her laugh; he was the most beautiful little boy anyone had seen.  She would never forgive him if he left him alone.  He would never forgive himself if he left his son all alone.  He knew how it felt.  He knew what he would do though, what he must do.  He would raise him, but not as his son.  He would raise his son, his sole heir, as Uzumaki Hinata's son.  He would carry on his name, and her eyes.  He would learn to live and love as though Hinata were with him every step of the way.  Naruto would make sure of that.

                Right before hitting the ground with a fatal blow, Naruto flipped and landed feet first.  He would raise her son, and he would do it right.  Her death would not be in vain.  Naruto would rebuild this village, piece by piece if he had to.  His son will know his father, and his son will know the love of a parent, but most importantly, his son would be his wife's son, his lover's son, his soul mate's son, Hinata's son.

**"When you cry I'll wipe away all of your tears, when you scream I'll fight away all of your fears, I'll hold your hand through all of these years, and you will have… all of me."**

_Well this is the result of my utter angst.  It's got an uplifting ending, and I had to change the words a lot to fit this meaning, or else it would not only be tragic, but would end up with Naruto thinking he didn't need Hinata in the first place, which is, in this case, the opposite of the point of this story.  I hope you like it, review._


End file.
